i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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