weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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