from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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