I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
