omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
