i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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