Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
