Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
