The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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