fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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