I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Be still, my beating vagina.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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