Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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