sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
