we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
