It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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