i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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