I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Randomize