We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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