You work out of a Hotel?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
