Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
This is classic penis vs brain.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize