I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
