I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
third nipple confirmed
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
