AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
