We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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