your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Randomize
