I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
