i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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