just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
