I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
