Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize