so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
