I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
