Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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