even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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