so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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