As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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