This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize