I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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