he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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