You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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