I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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