Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
