she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Less talking, more tequila
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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