found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Bring me that man meat
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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