Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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