i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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