no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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