I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
