I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Sext me about skeletons
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
