she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
