This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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